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Category Archive for: ‘Self Esteem’

Self Esteem

People come to therapy with the request for help with their self-esteem. Simply put, they say they don’t have enough self-esteem and they want more self-confidence. They describe themselves as having lots of inadequacies and insecurities. Focus on the positives. We all have strengths and weaknesses. It’s your choice whether you focus on your capabilities or your deficits. A person …

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Confidence Building

Confidence is an ingredient in having good self-esteem. When people come in to improve their self-esteem we work on skills to develop more confidence. Confidence is a quality that creates successful people. However, you don’t need to initially experience success to build confidence. Unfortunately, most people believe you have to achieve to build the confidence, but I maintain you have …

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The Chicken or the Egg

If you suffer from low self-esteem, I would like you to ask yourself the following: Is my negative thinking and pessimism contributing to my low self-esteem, or is my low self-esteem causing my negative and pessimistic attitude? Regardless, it’s absolutely critical that someone with low self-esteem retrain their faulty thinking .Let me give you some examples of two very different …

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Stretching Out of Your Comfort Zone

Is fear keeping you from doing something that has been tugging at your heartstrings? When things get quiet and the distractions are few, is there a nagging feeling that continues to haunt you, reminding you that there is a calling that you are choosing to ignore? I am a believer in the philosophy that you only live once, so it …

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When We Play, We Find Our Way

For many of adults, play is like sex. It requires that you schedule it into your routine. Life can be so busy, with so much activity scheduled into an average day that playing (like sex) can get put on the back burner and never carried out. I work with lots of clients who do not regularly participate in play. When …

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Feeding Your Self-Esteem

In about 70% of the clients I see, they voice that they would like to improve their self-esteem. They report that they don’t like themselves and they have trouble identifying what is unique or special about them. Since my entire career has revolved around the study of people, I can easily understand how difficult it is for my clients to …

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Words Shape Attitudes

My colleague and I teach seminars on improving self-esteem and self-confidence. We are frequently asked what is the number one way to convey a sense of confidence. One of the most empowering things a person can do is to speak confidently and with authority. Why? Because words shape attitudes. Self-confidence is an attitude or state of mind. Although clients typically …

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The Giver

If I had to characterize one personality type that has the most difficulty changing, it would be “the giver”. The giver is a person who spends his or her life doing for others. They consistently put their needs on the back burner and take care of all of those that come before them. Invariably, they hook up with spouses, children, …

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The Power Struggle of Marriage

If you are married or have been married, then you know that marriage can be extremely tough. It is a juggling act of balancing your needs within the needs of your relationship. It’s that constant tug and pull of blending what you want individually with balancing the needs of your partner. As if that wasn’t tough enough, add into the …

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Your Cross to Bear

Is there something that has occurred in your life that you feel “is just not fair”? Maybe it’s situational–your parents divorced, your spouse left you, the business went bankrupt, you experienced a miscarriage–and you say to yourself, “This just isn’t fair.” Often, we inherit it: a predisposition toward drug or alcohol addiction or an illness such as arthritis, lupus, diabetes, …

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