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Do You Make Them Feel Important?

I am frequently asked what life skills are the most important in helping a client become successful in life. I could never narrow it down to just one life skill, but I do believe if a client utilizes at least four of the life skills listed below, this will consistently ensure them great success.
• Life Skill #1—Character Strengths. Knowing your character strengths is essential to creating and achieving goals.
• Life Skill #2—Reframing. Being positive and learning from any situation keeps you out of the victim role and is empowering.
• Life Skill #3—Encouragement. Noticing the effort instead of the outcome keeps you focused on the progress that you are making, both within yourself and in the work of others.
• Life Skill #4—Making others feel important.

Would you consider yourself a person who makes others feel important or special? Do you convey to others that they contribute greatly to your life? If you are pondering the question, you might likely be a person who could use some boning up on this approach.

Possessing the life skill of making others feel important is an art form and requires that you verbally appreciate the people around you and remind them of their positive qualities. It conveys the notion that you notice their talents and abilities. It will boost their self-esteem and increase their sense of self-worth.

When people feel appreciated, they are more likely to be happier, more productive, and enjoy their surroundings. This creates a pleasant environment that is more conducive to relationships where people enjoy each other and are more positive.

Practice these skills daily and you will not only make a difference in the lives of others, but you will be a person that others want to associate with—both at work and at home.

• Notice what is going on around you and comment on it in a positive way. For example, “Things are really quiet here. You really know how to run a smooth office.”
• Be complimentary in an honest way. For example, “Sandy, you really are a people person and you made that customer feel so at ease.”
• Notice the effort, not the outcome. For example, “Tom, it looks like there is a lot of hard work going into that project. I am glad you’re on my team.”
• Use sustainment skills. Look at the person eye-to-eye, nod your head, letting them know you hear them, and smile at them as you pass them.
• Inquire about other people’s well-being.

People inherently want to know that they are valued. If you work on making them feel appreciated you will be validating your relationship with them. Your positive comments will have a domino effect, whether at home or at work. It’s important to be genuine about your comments. Don’t inundate people with too many compliments. People with low self-esteem won’t believe you if you compliment them too much.

If you are a positive person, it will make a difference, so practice this skill with regularity and get ready to see some startling results.

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